To be continued???

Words I never thought I would see at the end of a Chuck Palahniuk novel, but as I devoured the final paragraph of his latest offering, Damned, those 3 little words were what I found to be the conclusion.
First thing, if you don't know who Chuck is, crawl out from under your rock, and run, don't walk down to your local bookseller.  Beg their forgiveness, and then ask them to please help you find a copy of Pygmy or Survivor, or Snuff. 
  If something a little more mainstream is what you are looking for, ask for a copy of Fight Club.  Oh, that rang a bell? Directed by David Fincher, starring Ed Norton, Brad Pitt and Helena Bonheim-Carter, the Hollywood adaptation of Chuck's commentary on the perversity of the  American dream introduced Chuck's ideology to the masses, while conversely leaving Chuck himself shrouded in the mediocrity of relatively obscurity.  I could write whole essays on the scathing insights contained in those pages, but the first rule of Fight Club must be revered. YOU DON'T TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB.
  A brilliant American Novelist with a deft,  satirical grasp on the decaying heartbeat of modern culture, Chuck has developed a loyal fan base that far outweighs cult status.
  Each of his novels is a standalone expose into the rotten core of a facet of American culture that Chuck finds laughable, corrupt, or just out right ridiculous.   So imagine my surprise to see those 3 little words at the end of Damned.  A second book?
The story of Madison Spencer, the porky progeny of a jet-setting Hollywood power couple who insist on adopting a new under-privileged orphan from a third world country to coincide with each movie premier (ring any bells?), Madison has the luck to wake up dead. Not Zombie dead, or god forbid, Emo Vampire  Undead, but really and truely consigned to damnation in Hell D-E-A-D.  For those of you familiar with the work of Christopher Moore, Madison shares many qualities with Abby Normal.  Scathing, aloof, and way to big for her britches, 13 year old Madison is an intriguing tour guide on this romp through the hereafter.
  A Breakfast Club in Hell, mixed with journal entries reminiscent of Judy Blume's Are You There God?  It's Me Margaret, Damned explores the values that fixate our culture on the great beyond.  In true Chuck fashion, very little of the "truth" of hell is what one would expect to find based on the common conceptions.  With focus on topography that includes the swamp of partial birth abortions and the sea of wasted semen, Chuck never shies away from horrific  imagery that is guaranteed to sear itself directly into the cerrebellum of his readers.
So why the "To Be Continued"?  As it turns out Chuck has modeled this undertaking on Dante's Divine Tragedy.  3 works focusing on: Damnation, Purgatory, and finally Redemption.  Written over 2 and a half years while Chuck cared for his dying Mother, Damned, and its follow up novels are Chucks expression of grief for the things in life that can't be compartmentalized and controlled.
While as a stand alone work, Damned does not near the perfection of some of Chuck's other classic pieces such as Rant, Invisible Monsters, or Tell All, I am intrigued to see where Madison's journey of self-discovery will take her on her long road to Redemtion. 

Rules of Engagement

Over the years I have come to realize that I had it pretty easy during my teenage years.  My parents only really had two rules for us to follow.  Simple, straight forward, and direct, these rules were known to all of my friends, and most of my family - but of-course only we were expected to adhere to them.  Each parent had one rule, as follows:

#1: No babies! - This was mom's rule, and I think that it speaks volumes about her take on parenthood.  Be safe, be smart, and be prepared to deal with the consequences of your actions.  As a funny side bar my folks got a huge laugh during
Their speech at my wedding reception when they announced that rule #1 no longer applied.

#2: Put the tool back where you found it! - This was Dad's rule.   While it certainly applied directly to my formative years spent as cheap labour for the family business, it was also intended to instill a sense of order and responsibility.

Both of these rules have certainly served me well over the years, but I have also had to come up with a few of my own over the years that apply in a more direct fashion with my everyday life.  Because I quite often find myself mentoring young people in my line of work (young women more often than not) I have come up with the following 3 rules for them to follow:

#1: Don't fuck the talent.  - I can't truly take credit for rule #1.  It was actually imparted to me during my first apprenticeship by a friend who I greatly respect and admire.  It just makes sense!  Break rule #1 at your own peril!

#2: Boys are dumb. - It's true.  They are. They prove it time and time again.   Don't believe me? Just give it a while.

#3: Knowledge of the aforesaid does not forgive said behaviour.  This applies directly to rule #2.  Don't put up with that nonsense!

I like to think that the people I have mentored, as well as the friends and co-workers that I have shared these rules with over the years will take them to heart and perhaps adapt them to create their own set of life rules. 

Because everything is better with Optimus Prime.

I feel that in order to launch this blog properly, he needs to be a part of it.  Because he's the coolest.

No Really.

What would Wil Weaton do?

Inquiring minds want to know.

A big thank-you to Kat for this photo.