Every Girl's Crazy 'Bout a Sharp Dressed Man

Primer's Visual Guide to Understanding Common Suit0 Features

Stumbled Upon the above link tonight and it just so happens that it contains a wealth of information that I believe every man should be aware of. 

I urge all of you men out there to read the above article, as you will likely learn something that will come in handy down the road.

Most of the guys I know don't enjoy having to put on a suit, forget about knowing anything about how to properly wear one.
"How many buttons should they do up on their 3 button jacket?"
"How many vents should they have?" "How do they tie a full Windsor knot?"  These are all questions that either I have asked,  and heard asked by friends and family members recently.

I believe this lack of knowledge stems from our generations lack of respect for the suit in general.  Growing up, we all viewed suits as stuffy, restrictive, uncomfortable things worn only either by pretentious businessmen, or to a somber occasion like a funeral.  There were no fun, entertaining examples of reasons to put on a suit.

Now, in my 30's, I have learned to respect the suit.  And for this I would primarily  like to thank Barney Stinson.  Portrayed by Neil Patrick Harris on the hit CBS comedy How I Met Your Mother, Barney is almost aways sporting a tailored suit and is always calling on his wingmen to "Suit-up" for a night on the town.  Barney has taught us that suits command respect, and often deliver LEGENDARY results that may be otherwise unattainable! While I recognize that I am congratulating a fictional character for his approach to life, and that this series was in reality dreamed up by a team of writers in a board room at CBS, I would still like to thank the team that created Barney for their take on the impact of the suit in today's society.

Case in point.
I recently had the opportunity to "Suit-up" in Vegas, and head out on the town,  and I can 100% affirm that people really do treat you differently when you are dressed in a suit.

Special thanks to HFJ for classing up the entire event.

My Night With Lois Lane

While this story is a few years old, I think it's a good one, so I am going to share it, and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.  So there.

While I was out on the road, touring a Broadway-style show, I found myself stranded in Livingston Montana with a couple of days off.  If you have ever been to Montana, odds are that you know there isn't a damn thing to do there...so I figured I was stuck, when all of a sudden a very interesting opportunity came my way.

One of my lead actor's, who also happens to be a good friend had made arrangements to meet an old acquaintance for dinner and asked me, and another pair of company members to join them.  No big deal.  Its just a dinner, right?  Well, as it turns out, it was to be a night to remember as the acquaintance turned out to be Lois Lane herself, Margot Kidder.

Brian had directed Margot in a show at Stage West years ago, and they had maintained a pretty good relationship over the years so this dinner invitation was a chance for old friends to get caught up, and her to be hospitable to some of his traveling companions.

Margot picked the four of us up at our hotel in her Suburban, with 2 very large, very energetic dogs in tow.

Our first stop was Costco to pick up enough food to feed an army.  2 HUGE Pork loins, and salad fixings, strawberries...groceries, and alot of them.

Next stop, the local pharmacy so Margot could fill her "prescriptions".  Margot was very open and honest with us all night about her battle with mental illness, and I have to give her credit for being a very brave, independent individual.  She is also very politically minded, and a huge supporter of President Obama.

We were under the impression that this was to be a very low key evening in.  The night started with a tour of her lovely, modest home, and included what I still consider to be the highlight of the event.  In Margot's 2nd story den, above the mantle I discovered a framed copy of the famous Daily Planet Newspaper Article wirtten by Lois Lane "My Night With Superman."  This discovery really made my night.  I have always been a huge Superman fan, and as if meeting Margot wasn't enough of a thrill, seeing this piece of movie history really made my night.  I asked Margot about the piece, and she told me that it had been given to her as a gift by one of the props people many years after the movie wrapped filming. 

Turns out that Margot had invited 20 of her closest friends over for a dinner party to celebrate our being in town, and had plans to prepare a huge meal.  Unfortuantely, Margot's idea of prepping a huge meal was to attempt to put the pork loins in the microwave to cook them...Bless her, she was pretty much useless in the kitchen, but has a huge heart. 

So three of us from the show, the drummer, one of the two lead actors, and me, the stage manager, slaved away in the kitchen for most of the evening cooking the meal while Margot and Brian regailed us with some fantastic stories, all of which I have promised never to repeat, I will say I learned some things about Christopher Reeve that night ;)

While we slaved away over the hot stove, we may have sampled a few bottles of wine...okay more than a few...

Eventually, mostly thanks to our drummer's kitchen wisdom, and my unparralled ability to stir a boiling pot, we were able serve a pretty damn fine meal.  We had set up 3 or 4 tables in Margot's living room on the main floor to accomodate all of the guests.  Margot's guests included a number of local artists and notables including author Maryanne Vollers, who wrote Ghosts of Mississippi.  It actually was a lovely evening, with alot of fun conversation, and only one beret wareing jackass, a local retired war correspodant, turned philospher who got raging drunk and insisted on attempting to make very long winded toasts every 15 minutes for the remainder of the evening.  Margot and Maryanne eventually told him to sit down and shut up.  Pretty funny.

At the end of the evening we (the same three that had prepped the meal) did the dishes and helped put the house in order.  My memory gets pretty hazy about this part of the evening as I was happily hammered, but I do know that I washed alot of dishes!  Since a few of us were in rough shape, Margot offered to put us up for the night, but as we needed to be back on our tour bus the next morning to leave town, she wound up loaning us her vehicle and one of the sober actors drove us back to the hotel.  Good times had by all, except maybe the douche waffle in the beret, but no one cares about him...

Resident Evil: Retribution - 90 minutes you will never get back

Got out last night to see the latest offering from the Resident Evil franchise on the big screen.
I did enjoy the opening sequence - shown in reverse, it picks up exactly where the last film left off.  However, I thought it was a little odd for the film makers to then show the exact same footage in the usual (forwards) order immediately afterwords...just in case you didn't understand what you were seeing the first time around.  In case this convention was too much for you to follow...or you had never seen a film before...or just crawled out from under a rock directly into the movie theatre and chosen this film as your introduction to pop culture of western civilization. If that was infact the case then I am so sorry about your luck.
The rest of the movie was the closest the franchise has come to putting an 80's video game on the big screen.  Nonsensical plot, random flashy locations explained away with little care to the fact that they just don't make sense.  Big Boss fights throughout.  Big special effects that add nothing to the lack of story.
I will say that Mila Jovovitch still looks fantastic in the role of Alice, but that really isn't enough to carry a movie franchise.
For a film franchise that started out being all about a zombie apocalypse, they have strayed a long way from where they started.
And on that note, like every other Resident Evil film,  the ending leaves the door open for yet another sequel.
Will it be a sequel that I want to see? Not likely.
Luckily I wasn't expecting much from this film, and that is exactly what I got.  Unless you are a hardcore fan don't bother.

Fifty Shades of Green

So you put 8 theater folk at the table in the corner at a theater wedding, and you have to realize that things are going to get a little rowdy...especially when all of your center pieces are children's toys from the 80's and there is alcohol involved.

Allow me to present Fifty Shades of Green: A Muppet Sex Extravaganza, brought to you by the fantastic, twisted minds of Craig Pearson, Vinny Kolcz, Heather Landon, Jenine Kroeplen, Crystal Ellis, Jessica Bray, Just The Wife, and Yours Truely.

I hope this brings a smile to your face.